A thousand different ways (On change and adaptability)

 This past year out of university has been eye-opening for me. I have gone through waves of emotions, I have dreamt, and I have felt defeated. There are moments I wake up and feel like I can take on anything and that I get to control my own 'destiny', and there are other moments when I feel like life does what it wants and we just have to find a way to get through it, or we have no other choice but to sit and absorb whatever is being thrown at us. I wrote earlier about not knowing what to do with my life, and perhaps I was being a 'glass half empty' kind of person when I believed that was a devastating position to be in.

I am a big dreamer, and that can be a great thing. It can help you set goals in place and give you something for you to channel your energy and resources to. But, one thing about life is that it is dynamic, and there is no blue print on how to live it. So, that idea you have about how you will shape your life, could very well become a hindrance to you seeing all the other things in front of you, and all other ways in which you can live your life. This year, I have learned to open my eyes to try and see things right in front of me. I have been standing staring at this far-off distance, seeing images my brain has conjured, refusing to realize that it is not a straight forward path to that destination; refusing to go through equally interesting pathways that are just around the corner and missing out on what might lay in store. I have come to realize that sometimes it is alright to let the wind carry you. At those moments when you have lost a bit of control, you might figure out ways to push back, or you might get more of a bearing as the wind blows.

I have learned that there is absolutely no shame in changing your mind. Nobody truly cared about the plans you might have announced to them yesterday. Even if they did, they have little to no stakes in your life. And even if they did, everyone who has gotten to a certain age has probably realized that we do not know what we are doing. Everyone is winging it and we are all in the business of who can pretend best that they have things figured out. Change your mind in such a remorseless manner, that while describing your new plans to someone you previously spoke with, they might get confused as to if you were the same person they had spoken to. Life is short. If you have tried something and realized it is not for you, do not shy away from walking away from that thing and trying another thing which you might have had no interest in previously. 

There are a thousand ways to kill a rat. So find the way that works for you, especially because trying things in the way that other people have done it and seemed to succeed might make you feel like something is wrong with you. So do it your own way, as long as you do it well. Some people might argue that there is a reason why things have been done a certain way for generations, but for the things that did change, it is because people decided to try something a different way. Change requires a certain amount of madness. Even for the smallest things, it takes some audacity. Trying new things when there is always the possibility of failure or disappointment is bold and scary. But the thing is, Life is fully ready to embarrass you anyways, so you might as well do things on your own terms.

The most important point in this piece is being open to change. Try something new, something different. Try to do old things in newer ways; in other ways; in ways that work for you. Try to look around you with different eyes. Change your mind, again and again and again. Not just for the 'grand' things like career paths and countries you live in. It could be something like your favourite colour, or shoes that people would never associate with your sense of style. Allow yourself to be adaptable. Be shameless. There is not one method to being or living so it is unlikely that you are doing it the wrong way. Just choose what ways you want, and try. When life does throw you lemons, stop and breathe, rest, recover, and then figure out what you could use the lemons for- lemonade, a cleaning or bleaching agent, fragrance, or perhaps an absurd thing no one would consider lemons being used for.